i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
tell me about the eggs
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