marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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