we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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