He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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