The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
