the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
