my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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