If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
