are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Randomize
