That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Randomize
