drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Randomize
