Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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