she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Randomize
