We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
