I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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