Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
