she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
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