I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I can't put those talents on a resume
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
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