They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
