you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
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