My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
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