btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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