The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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