You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
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