You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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