New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
wow bdsm is so cute
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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