I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
