Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
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