We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Randomize
