But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
Randomize
