i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Randomize
