billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Randomize
