I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
