Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
In America we eat man semen.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
