We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
