my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
