fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
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