My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I'm like, not good at living.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize
