sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Randomize
