Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Randomize
