Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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