A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Randomize
