Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I smell like Dick and happiness
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
