i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Randomize
