omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
we're chasing vodka with high fives
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
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