So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize
