Where are you?
In a non slutty way
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I need a beard to bite.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
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