watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
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