I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
