How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
