he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
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